A trick-or-treat wish list for college students

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15. A job
14. “Halloween” VIP pass/director’s wristband. Did you hear Johnny Depp is going to be there?
13. Caramel-apple-flavored condoms
12. Self-Actualization
11. A date with Tad Hamilton
10. An extension on that thesis, Doc
9. Free ink refills
8. A job
7. 10 years of our lives back
6. Jesus’ forgiveness for celebrating Satan’s holiday
5. A way to tell the guy in the Joker          costume that he’s three years late
4. Rocks
3. Please, please give me a job. I interned     at my dad’s company once and I  swear I can pass a criminal background check.
2. Since this is a fantasy where college kids can trick-or-treat: A pony!
1. Snickers